My world turned upside down in summer 2011, when my husband of 16 years fell in love with a long-time mutual friend of ours, and left me to be with her.

Our relationship wasn’t perfect by any means, but we’d given up, and he turned to someone else. We’d always said we were never going to break up. We told newlyweds “just don’t break up” …. we said we’d “rather fight than switch.

It’s been a year and I’m not divorced or recovered from the break up. We are simply “estranged” … we have no children at all.

I can’t decide which last name to choose when we finally divorce. I don’t feel like I relate to my married name OR my maiden name. I have considered my grandmothers maiden names. I don’t know. My maiden name would be easiest because some bills and stuff still come in my maiden name (after 16 years!) but, keeping my married name would be even more simple.

so, the question is “nancy what?”